Haven't posted in a while. Nothing new.
New stress, though. New job. New guy. New friendships. New things here and there.
Computer's dead, so I have to get a new one. That's not (EVER) going to happen on my salary, though.
Not really sure what I'm doing with my life, at this point. I'm not even sure of what I WANT to do. I was ready to throw myself into this new job - liking it, even.
After today, it's just another fucking job, with another fucking asshole of a boss. How anyone can be that totally blind and oblivious to how you treat others and make them feel escapes me entirely. ENTIRELY. On no level do I connect with this guy. He thinks we do, but he thinks that about everyone. Actually, he WANTS to think that. He WANTS people to like him and trust him...but they don't. There's a reason we've had a turnover of almost 25 people in less than five months. And, he's it.
I'd like to be entirely retroactive and tell you everything that's been going on, but I have a feeling that will come in time. Right now, I'm drinking too much, smoking too much, abusing myself too much, stressing too much, and it doesn't look like there's ANYTHING good on the horizon. At one point, everything was GREAT. Now, it's back to shit.
I'm sorry - I just can't believe we, the employees, are actually fighting King Asshole, the creator, to push this business to work. It's like he's intentionally sabotaging himself. But, he wants it this way. All he cares about is being A MAN, being misogynistic and being a God-damn control freak. I thought my last boss was bad, but he actually had rules in which he had to contain his misogyny. This time, it IS this guy's business, so he has lots of pull this time around.
We have one more "ace in the hole," and if this doesn't work, I'm out of there.
FUCK. THAT. NOISE.
Have to run. I'll update more soon, if not this evening.
Miss you guys. &=(
4.30.2010
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