this is BAT COUNTRY

ok, ok, guess what i got today????

A BAT!

ok, so, here's what happened. i was running late to work, and as i came out to lock the door to my apartment, i saw this big, dark thing out of the corner of my eye. i looked and saw a bat laying there, FLAT as a pancake, wings splayed all the way out. i was like, "OMG! OMG! is he...are you dead?" so, i picked him up, or at least i tried to. his claw-toe-things were embedded in the concrete. but i managed to pick him up high enough that when i had my hand under him, i could feel his tiny pulse/heartbeat. i started yelling, "OMG, you're NOT dead!" i know the people in the complex were like, "why is she always so weird???" so, i picked him up and cradled him in my warm hand, hoping that maybe he was just injured or cold or something. i was really late at that point, so i figured i'd take him to work with me. my boss and some of the people i work with are big hunters/outdoorsy-type people, so i knew they'd help me.

i got in the car and called my aunt, since they'd had experiences with their own bat "bruce," who lived in their house. i was about halfway to work, and we were talking bat-talk, when i felt movement in my hand. i looked down and said, "awww, he's trying to pick his head up!" amy said, "jimmy, if he starts flying around in that car..."

"OMG, GAAAH, HE'S AWAKE!!! HE'S GOT A WING OUT!"

he had apparently "come to," picked up his head, realized he was no longer in "bat country," and FREAKED. i had him by his left wing and chest, in the palm of my hand, and his head was up and his right wing was sticking straight out. when he woke up, he opened his mouth (bats have big mouths), and stuck his right wing out HUGE, and started clicking like mad. he was grabbing onto my shirt with his right wing fingernail-thing, while i was trying to hold him with my left hand, pull his nail off with my right, and navagate the interstate with my knee. he was freaking and bit me, like, 6 times, but it didn't hurt. it was like he didn't have any teeth. maybe they were just tiny and needle-like, and he's injected me with vampire poison, so now i'll have to feed from the blood of the living.

or he could just be a baby and not have any teeth.

so, anyway, he totally comes alive and is echo-locating like CRAZY. i know he's scared, and I'M scared, and amy's on the other end of the phone, yelling, "THROW HIM OUT THE WINDOW!!!" i was like, "onto the interstate??? are you crazy??!?" so, he kinda calmed down a little bit, once he realized that not only was i not going to let him go (flying around the car and more than likely into my hair), but he was also not really in peril, because he wasn't dying or hurting.

somehow, i made it to work and into a parking space. so, i'm sitting in the parking lot, holding a bat.

i just brought a BAT to work.

i mean, it sounded like a good idea in my head! so, i'm thinking, "how am i gonna get this guy inside?" i mean, i can't stick him in my bag, because he'll probably climb out, but more than likely, get squished. i was like, ummmmm.......so, i stuck him in my pocket!

i walked in to my department, walked right up to my boss and said, "umm, i have a little bit of a problem." he said, "ok. what is it?" i opened my pocket, and he jumped back and said, "WOAH! what the....??" he pointed over to one of my coworkers and said, "he's the man you need to talk to." so, i showed him to the other guy, tommy, while chris went and got me a box. tommy said he was just a brown bat. out of all the bazillions of bats in the universe, i got a brown one. he said, he probably got lost or bumped into something and was out when i found him. i said, "well, he was comin' alive on the way here!" chris came back and had him a lil box with a towel in it! i stuck him in chris' face and said, "say 'thank you, uncle chris!'" chris was like, "ehhhh...."

so, my bat is currently residing in a box, on top of some books, in my department. they keep SHOWING him to everyone, so i'll be getting fired any minute now for bringing wild animals to work. but he's SO CUTE! &=D i never thought i'd say that about a bat! but he is!!! i wish i would keep him, but i know i can't. i'm gonna wait until night, then take him out and put him on a tree behind my apartment, like tommy said. he said he was little enough that he could have just been a baby that got lost.

*doe eyes* I HAVE A LOST BABY BAT! &=(

then, chris kept asking derrick how much he could pay him to eat my bat.

guys are so frickin gross.

nobody's eating MY bat. i keep going to check on him, but he's just sitting in there, breathing really hard, making lotsa poops. he's got his lil wings pulled way up underneath him so you can't even tell he has wings. he looks like a little mouse...with REALLY long toenails. i can't wait to get him home. i think i'm gonna run by heather's and borrow her camera, so i can take his picture. he's gonna LOVE that.

yay! i'm temporary mother to a bat!

i found a baby bird in the parking lot of my junior college years ago. i'm TERRIFIED of birds, so i cried because i had to pick it up. but i couldn't just leave it there - i'm not that kind of person. back when i lived in pell city, i would take wild animals to my vet's office all the time - i know they got really sick of that. but i can't help it!

anyway, i'm pretty sure this guy (girl?) can fly, so we'll see tonight. if you see anything on the news about a girl in birmingham being attacked by a "nipsey-russle" of bats, you'll know it wasn't a freak accident.

just a freak.