6.25.2009

Fuck this

I'm no one's back-up.

That's what I feel like right now.

I know I shouldn't feel so angry and bitter, but I do. I feel like I'm the one that people "wouldn't mind trying out" if their current relationships were to fail.

There are a couple of people who actually care for me - or at least they think they do (not to cheapen their emotions).


But, then, you know there are always the ones that YOU have your emotions set on...and those are always the ones who hurt you. I guess because you let them, because you're opening yourself up to them in the hopes that they'll do the same, all the while, you're hurting the people who are standing in YOUR emotional wake, waiting for YOU to come around.

Emotions suck. Love sucks. Relationships are far too complicated. We really should have just "THE ONE" to whom we belong, "THE ONE" on whom we can fully rely.

I know promises can be fleeting, love isn't always guaranteed, but I like to think that I take it all pretty seriously.


I've never been a side A. I'm always the side B. But, I'd never choose to be any other way.