My original Sudanese inspiration

I look at this photo every night before I go to bed, and especially, when I'm in pain or think I have it bad. I think about this little girl all the time:

I want to help these people. I feel compelled, pulled. Sure, they're here, too. But, I don't want to stay here. I want to go. I want to travel. I want to help. I want to live.

I want to learn.

Yes, I still want to go.

From Boston.com:

A Kenyan boy screams as he sees kenyan policeman with a baton approach the door of his home in the Kibera slum of Nairobi 17 January 2008.

Hundreds of police who had earlier clashed with supporters of Kenya's opposition leader Raila Odinga at the entrance of the slum moved into the shantytown and did a house to house search for protestors.



I started a joke, which started the whole world crying...

Okay, so there's been some shit going on at work, and apparently, someone found out that I went to belly dancing class on Thursday, one of the days I was off work, and thus, spread it around the department. So, now, everyone's pissed, and apparently, just because they found out I went, I'm the reason for the downfall and crappiness of the Radiology Department.

You know what? Yeah, I went to class. You know what else? It was after hours, and it's none of your DAMN BUSINESS what I do on my off time. You know what I did there? I took a ton of pain
meds before I went. And, I sat. And, I watched. And, I took notes.

But, as my boss said, "what would you think if you found out someone did that? You must have felt well enough to go to class."

First of all, I don't CARE what these people do in the time they're not here. It's none of my business, and I don't want to know. If they tell me, fine.

Secondly, I'M NOT SICK. MY ASS HURTS. Plus, I had fucking cabin fever like you wouldn't believe. I doped my shit up, a friend took me to class, I sat stark still and observed, then I went home. I like my class, and I want to be a part of it, when I can. I didn't DO anything.

No one's ever called to check on me or sent me flowers or even a card, after I've had surgery. I take that back. A COUPLE of people have done that. You know how many fucking cards we've passed around here for everyone to sign???? Once, I got a card in the mail that said, "The Radiology Department."

WOW. I mean, don't everyone care all at once. God love her, she was the one who thought of me and went out and bought the card and signed it herself. And, I appreciate that very much. Thank you.

All the rest of the times, and Mig knows what I'm talking about, everyone thinks I'm a big liar. That I'm overly dramatic, and I'm faking it. Yes, I bought that green snot at a novelty shop. I screamed at the top of my lungs last night, so that I wouldn't have a voice the next day. I physically cracked a bat over my kneecap, so that it would break, causing me excruciating pain. My ass? It's all lies. Just because

Anyway, stay out of my fucking personal life. I don't get all up in YOUR business. If you tell someone, that's your prerogative. But, I'll never speak of MY business ever again. If you're lame enough to try to dig up some dirt on me, read it here. I don't care. You must be pretty bored to have to read this stuff anyway. Because most of you aren't friends of mine. Work friends?
Riiiiiiight. These people stab each other in the back, before their backs are even turned. Yes, I've been party to it.

But, I've decided, my resolution this year will be "don't tell me - I don't want to know."

I smile just to get through the day. &=D Trust me, I don't want to be here, any more than you want me here.

It's all in the timing.........

Those of you who DO actually care about me, thank you. YOU know me, and that's all that matters. Some of you have watched me walk through the fires of hell and been there to great me on the other side. YOU are the most important people to me. What happens at work is just trite and trivial. It's all about who's getting the blame next. But, it's never the higher-up's fault. In fact, TKC is having that problem right now.

*sigh* It comes from everywhere, though. The department was falling apart, before I even HAD surgery. And, it didn't have anything to do with me. So, I'm the late one. I'm DOING something to remedy MY problem. We've got all the ones that TKC has - the late one, the bitchy one, the one who can't do anything right, the one who leaves early, the hateful one, the one who never calls....they're all over the damn hospital.

We used to work well, but I also used to give a crap. The reason I DON'T give a crap anymore, is because nothing's going to change. It's NEVER going to change. It's partially the fault of the main source, but it's also _________________'s fault. Fill in the blank. Let's compare answers, and see who each person sees as the problem.

It's not that I hate anyone. I'm just sick of everyone's crap. Hell, I'm sick of my OWN crap. It's just like being back in high school again - and I hated high school! Only, now, it's GROWN MEN & WOMEN who are involved, butting into your friggin' business!

I don't INTEND on being late. I don't ENJOY being sick. I'm certainly not CELEBRATING, when I find out I have to have surgery, or the flu, or pink eye, or a cyst, or taking one hundred thousand days off. And, if the boss doesn't write me up, then he doesn't write me up! I've TOLD him to write me up before! I've done enough shit to get fired, but you know what? SO HAS EVERYONE ELSE!

You name it: harassment, threats, being late (not only me), intentionally lying, freaking out, insubordination, "i'm not doing it," "this isn't in my job description," "i'm leaving it like i found it"..... It's pretty ridiculous. And, that's just in THIS department, alone! Down in surgery, I have NO PROBLEMS. Everyone works together. Sure, they have their favorites, and their fights, and their cliques, and their lazies.

But, I acknowledge it! I know I'll always be known as "the late one!" I'm bitchy some days, I'm quiet some days, I'm lazy some days, and I'm bouncy and happy some days - sometimes I'm just not at the top of my game. But, more than not, (and NONE of you, can deny this), I'm fine. I work. I do MY job. And, it STILL amazes me that I can get in trouble, when I've done everything I'm supposed to do. It's like they LOOK for things.

I'm just tired, okay? I'm tired of being yelled at. I'm tired of being the one in trouble. I'm tired of being the target. I'm tired of being WATCHED.

I just work. I plow through the days. Lots of times, I have off days, where I'm just not totally here. A lot of the things I've been going through have messed up my rigorous, tight sleep schedule. I'm trying REALLY HARD, to get that back. Sometimes I even have to *shudder* ASK FOR HELP. Heather's calling to wake me up. My boss used to do it, but he would forget.




Holy sweet Jesus! Literally! Thank you, God! &=D

I've been messing around today, cleaning and trying to get things organized, and THEN, I sat down to pay bills. (dum dum dum)

I went ahead and made a payment on one of my two credit cards still floating around out there, First Premier - $50. The minimum payment was $25, but that's with an interest rate of 19.90%, since I had botched up a long time ago and couldn't make payments. The balance on the card is only $199.98, but with that kind of interest rate.....OUCH. So, actually, the balance used to be much lower.

Then, I made a payment on the other credit card, Capital One, for $76.19, which was the minimum due at the time, since I haven't paid on this one in a while. The balance on it was..........

Oh! You know what? I'm a freaking idiot!

I just went to look to see what the balance was, and apparently, I had mistaken the balance for the minimum due, so I just paid off my Capital One card!


Wow. That actually wasn't my intention, but oh well! That's okay, because I actually do have it. I had just intended on paying a little over the minimum balance due!

Hahahaha!!!! That was great! I never would have done that in real life! But, I did! &=D

Okay, ANYWAY, what I was getting at was, after I had paid my Capital One, I decided to call and just SEE if they would lower my APR, which was 18.99% with them. When I called, they transferred me to the "APR Lowering Squad," and I talked to THE nicest credit agent I've ever talked to in my life...and believe you, me I've talked to them ALL.

I told her my situation - I'd like to lower my APR, so that I could actually get my card paid off. On her end, I guess she saw my other card and said, "do you have another card you're paying on?" I told her yes, that I had just made a payment a few minutes before I called, and I was trying to pay that one off as well. She asked what the APR was there, and when I told her, she said, "You know, we could do a transfer, and transfer that balance over to your Capital One account. Once we did that, we could lower your APR to 9.9% for three months, then afterwards, it becomes a variable rate. The last time it went up, it only went up .15%."

I was totally shocked, and I was trying really hard to mentally figure out what the catch was (which I'm assuming is only the variable interest rate, which doesn't really bother me, since my leftover balance is so low). I really couldn't think of anything, and she explained things very thoroughly, so I decided, what the hell? I've always heard of people transferring balances back and forth to various credit cards, but I'd never done it. I'm 31 - time to try something new, and as usual, hope it doesn't backfire on me!

So, I have actually paid off my Capital One (mistakenly, but yay!), then transferred my almost $200 balance TO Capital One, with a 9.9% + variable interest rate, so this is going to be a breeze to pay off.


NOW, my only problem is all my medical bills and that damn apartment complex that won't leave me alone. But, that's another story.

So, everyone! Get on the horn right now and ask for lower interest rates! If you don't, you're just throwing money away!

Yes, my fanny is still broken, but I'm about to leave and go to Target, to get some things, pick up my meds at CVS, drop some bills off at the post office...and I think that's it. Then, I'll get to come home and chill, rest and read, watch tv or do some fun crafts.

And, I'm NOT using my credit card! &=P

There's so much crap I haven't posted, but want/need to. Just keep checking back. I'm going to ATTEMPT to post videos, but I really hate the face-ish part of myself, so I don't know. I wish I could just do audio! &=D But, there's also a picture blog I need to post, as all.

And, just to put everyone on high alert - if I EVER use the term "vlogging," KILL ME.

That is all.


House trumps butt surgery

I was just watching House on tv, and he started to play Baba O'Riley by The Who. I forget how much I really like this song:

Out here in the fields
I farm for my meals
I get my back into my living

I don't need to fight
To prove I'm right
I don't need to be forgiven

Don't cry
Don't raise your eye
It's only teenage wasteland

Sally, take my hand
We'll travel south cross land
Put out the fire
And don't look past my shoulder

The exodus is here
The happy ones are near
Let's get together
Before we get much older

Teenage wasteland
It's only teenage wasteland
Teenage wasteland
Oh, yeah
Teenage wasteland

They're all wasted!

The best part of the show is when his boss came in and stopped the music. Once House made whatever innane, insulting statement he had, he went to restart the music, and he restarted it to Hava Nagila.


This show makes me laugh.


Larry, meet Richard - Richard, Larry. Scoot over, Siegelman.

Hi, all. I've been sick with the flu. Just had the worst Thanksgiving I've had in, oh, um, nine years. I didn't even get to see my family. Anyway, I just wanted to share this:

Mayor Larry Langford Arrested on federal charges (*the city breaks out in spontaneous song & dance*)
Monday, December 1, 2008

Federal officials and the FBI have confirmed that Birmingham Mayor Larry Langford was arrested this morning and is being held at the federal courthouse on unspecified federal charges.

At this time details of the indictment are under seal and not available to the public.

According to attorney Tommy Spina, Al LaPierre, who was also part of the federal investigation headed by a special grand jury, is expected to surrender himself to federal authorities today.

It is believed that the charges are related to a US Securities and Exchange Commission lawsuit. The lawsuit claims that LaPierre and Montgomery area investment banker Bill Blount were involved in making undisclosed payments of $156,000 to Mayor Langford to help secure business from Jefferson County while Langford was serving as Jefferson County Commission president.

A press conference at the US Attorney's office is scheduled for 10am CST. Listen to 960 WERC for continuous team coverage of this breaking news story.

Deborah Vance-Bowie released this statement from the Mayor's chief of staff:

"As you know, the Mayor was detained this morning by federal authorities. We do not know the details of his detention at this time. City business will go on as usual as we are all here to do a job and we'll continue to do our jobs to ensure we deliver the best services to the taxpayers of Birmingham. This is certainly no surprise to us -- we anticipated something happening soon especially knowing Alice Martin's days in office are numbered with the swearing in of a new president in late January -- just a little over a month from now. We are glad the mayor will finally have his day in court. As members of his team, we stand behind him and look forward to the day when we can return the focus to the important issues before the city."

Now, whoever this Vance-Bowie character is, I'd like to sock her right in the mouth. Like Birmingham needs to be fraught with anyMORE scandal than we have going on right now! Speaking of which, WHO'S PAYING MY SEWER BILL??!?!

Aside from that, I just wanted to share the good news! Bring on the shackles and put this man next to Richard M Scrushy, the man who's harcuts are so expensive...but what is there to cut????

Ahhh, I love a good, hot cup of justice served, early in the morning.